ASMR is Finally Cool

This is so worth the nine minutes.

I mocked ASMR in 2010 on my website and created a prank whisper video that ends with the music from Psycho and an image of Pennywise the clown. Then I started listening to ASMR videos (soft-spoken only, thank you) and still listen to them often. Everyone has called me a weirdo for loving ASMR for like, 8 years.

This video brings my love of ASMR and my hatred of Trump together in one hilarious bit from Bill Maher with help from Moby.

https://youtu.be/wPi2QcQVCuY

I Was Wrong

Even though I have been wrong about many things, I still have hope that maybe things will work out. Here’s hoping.

Admissions

1. I was wrong about Trump losing the election.

2. I was wrong about Trump being quickly removed from office.

3. I was wrong about my fellow Americans putting ethics above tribalism.

4. I was wrong to think that overwhelming evidence of criminal conspiracy in the report would force Congress to impeach and convict Trump.

5. I was wrong about Congress being implicated in the report and being put into a position to impeach.

6. I was wrong about Trump’s children and Jared Kushner being indicted for financial and other crimes.

7. I was wrong about dozens of people in Trump’s orbit being charged in the social media conspiracy with the Russians.

8. I was wrong about Mike Pence and Paul Ryan being implicated in crimes.

9. I was wrong about William Barr being a good guy.

10. I was wrong to insist that everything will be alright and that justice will be served.

11. I was wrong to become addicted to MSNBC.

12. I was wrong to put so much hope into analysis & reporting on Twitter.

Justifications:

1. Because the Russians helped him

2. Because of the Constitution

3. Because I am naïve

4. Because, even if a narrow definition of criminal conspiracy was met, which it was not, the Office of Special Counsel “determined not to apply an approach that could potentially result in a judgment that the President committed crimes…fairness concerns counseled against potentially reaching that judgment when no charges can be brought. The ordinary means for an individual to respond to an accusation is through a speedy and public trial, with all the procedural protections that surround a criminal case.” In other words, the report was never going to make any sort of criminal accusation because that can only be done at trial.

5. …so far

6. …so far

7. Because EDVA hasn’t established yet that WikiLeaks coordinated with the GRU (Mueller was still investigating WikiLeaks-related matters in March of 2019). The Mueller Report clearly connects the Trump campaign with WikiLeaks, and the Roger Stone case clearly connects him with both the GRU (Guccifer 2.0) and WikiLeaks. So once the connection is established between WikiLeaks and the Russians, POOF we have evidence that people in Trump’s orbit illegally conspired to disseminate stolen materials. And POOF we have an underlying crime to drive charges of obstruction either through impeachment or after Trump leaves office. POOF. Treason. Bill Barr said it himself at his press conference; if the publisher was involved in the hack, then distributing their propaganda is a crime.

8. …so far

9. Cannot be justified

10. Because I am naïve

11. Cannot be justified

12. Hope is the only thing that keeps me sane

I believe that many, if not most, of the mysteries that were not solved by the Mueller Report are either one of the 12 ongoing Grand Jury cases or part of the counterintelligence investigation referred to the FBI.

These include:

  • The communication links between the Trump Tower server, Alfa Bank, and Spectrum Health
  • The nexus of Cambridge Analytica with Facebook, WikiLeaks, and the Trump Campaign
  • The coordination of disinformation/messaging between Fox News and the Russian state
  • Obstruction of justice by members of Congress
  • Russian money laundering in GOP campaigns
  • Everything ever done by Erik Prince and Jared Kushner

I no longer believe that Trump will leave office before his term ends, but I definitely would like to be pleasantly surprised. And I have no idea what will happen in the future.

Here’s hoping.

William Barr is Vomiting Right Now

There’s a lot of speculation that William Barr is sitting on the Mueller report either deciding what to do, redacting it or, in my visualization, repeatedly vomiting with terror after reading the entirety of the report and realizing what he has to do next – allow his friend Bob Mueller to indict several dozen people, including the president and his family, in a conspiracy to defraud the United States while knowingly assisting a hostile power’s act of war.

He also might be considering the choice of whether to allow an existing sealed indictment or two on Trump, filed under James Comey, to become unsealed while he is a sitting president. There is speculation at Patribotics that The Donald is under a sealed indictment for obstruction of justice in addition to a RICO charge for laundering Russian money via the Bayrock real estate deal. There’s also speculation that any criminal wrongdoing found by Robert Mueller might not allow for the indictment of a sitting president. That would mean that the indictment would be delayed until he leaves office.

Regardless of what is happening, let’s remember Barr’s testimony while under oath to Congress. He said “I told (Trump) how well I knew Bob Mueller and that the Barrs and Muellers were good friends and would be good friends when this was all over.” There is also reporting that Bob Mueller attended the wedding of two of Barr’s daughters.

So think about it. Visualize it with me and imagine that you are Bill Barr, who didn’t volunteer for the job, and your long time friend Bob Mueller walks into a secure briefing room to deliver you the report and tells you about what he has found – a truly shocking level of willing cooperation with a hostile enemy’s attack.

If this responsibility were placed on my shoulders like it has been placed on the shoulders of Bill Barr, I would either be literally shitting myself or puking my guts out. Just sayin’.

The Great American Bowel Movement of 2019

We are living through the greatest bowel movement of American history; sitting in the middle of something that’s really shitty with no idea what lies ahead. It’s a giant BM.

But in a few months, time will be known as B.M. – Before Mueller.

And when 2019 A.M. arrives – After Mueller, we will feel like we took the greatest dump of our lives.

You are All Wrong and I am Right

When it comes to Trump Russia, at this point things have become pretty binary for me.

Either the education I’ve gotten for the past two years into organized crime and counterintelligence, from people who supposedly have connections, has been a giant con and I am the equivalent of a Q-Anon conspiracist on the left…you know, engaging in ridiculous fantasies that these corrupt money launderers, mobsters, and enemies of the American people are going to jail, but basing it all on bogus information…

Or I’m right.

My friends, my family, and just about everyone but a handful of people think that I am wrong and are pessimistic in various degrees. What’s ironic is that 17 years ago I had a Geocities website called misternegative.com and I seem to be the most optimistic person that I know about America’s future.

Why are you so certain that there will be no hard evidence of a conspiracy between Trump and the Russians?

And when this evidence is hypothetically revealed, why are you so certain that no justice will come to those who have literally aided a hybrid war against our nation by a hostile foreign power?

Why are you so certain that America’s law enforcement agencies will allow a man to ascend to the presidency with the help of an enemy, and that he will somehow get off? That we are going to reward a presidential candidate who cheated into the presidency by not charging him with any crimes and letting him stay in office? Or that we will give him a deal and let him walk away?

Nah.

God Bless America

You are basing your belief on the past, which no longer applies. You believe that this is all politics as usual. You believe that the corrupt get away with crimes. You spew the “both sides” bullshit. You believe that the Clinton impeachment was similar to what is coming.

Well, you are also basing your opinion on a total lack of knowledge and research. A complete dearth of information. Ignorance about the names of the people involved, the crimes they are accused of, and it’s frankly fucking pathetic. Many people who I thought were well-informed are simply not.

Me? I’m basing my opinion on the information I have been consuming, and that information is either true or not true.

So since I’m all in, I’m going to share some things that a new source, a former political science professor with a connection, has begun to reveal on Twitter. I’ve decided that since no one believes me anyway or cares, what do I have to lose?

26 GOP Senators and one Bernie Sanders are going to be indicted for taking Russian money

150+ GOP House members are going to be indicted for the same

Dozens and dozens of state officials, mostly GOP, are going to be indicted for the same

Jared has been wearing a wire for two years and has tapes on Trump, Junior, Eric, Prince, and Giuliani

Another White House official has worn a wire

The indicted Senators will not necessarily sit in on the impeachment trial. Impeachment is adjudicated by the Chief Justice, the only one who can allow/disqualify a Senator. He happens to hate treason, has recently given an advisory opinion on the very matter of indicted senators voting on impeachment, and he will decide which indicted Senators will sit in the impeachment trial, if any.

So everybody whining about how there won’t be enough GOP Senators to convict is wrong. Everyone whining about Pence becoming President is wrong. Everyone sniveling about how nothing will ever change is wrong.

You are all wrong. And I am right. The subtitle on misternegative.com was “I am always right and you are always wrong.” It sadly holds true lately.

As I told my family in the spring of 2017 as they laughed at me, it will be Shock and Awe when the Mueller report drops. Shock and awe, motherfuckers.

And in 2019, one of the last things I will do on Facebook before I delete it is to arrange a giant party for myself, paid for by my friends and family, where I am celebrated for being such a fucking genius. Keep your eye open for the invite.

Or, if I’m wrong, I’ll publicly admit it. It’s binary.

Not worried.