Republicans Are Dumb

I spend a lot of time wondering why Republicans are so dumb. I am fascinated by how their minds “work.” I’m not talking about the Republicans from the 80’s and 90’s, those old-school normal people like my father – I’m talking about the modern-day MAGA mouth breathers who seem to have dominated the party ever since…oh…the black dude was elected President.

Republicans are dumb

Why did these idiots complain about the stimulus package in 2009 when the economy collapsed, then complain about the slow recovery, then claim that Donald Drumpf was responsible for the eventual recovery merely two months into his term? Why did they say that 5% unemployment didn’t accurately reflect reality under Obama but take credit for it under Dolt45? Why did they bring our legislative branch to a halt only to complain about how government sucks? Why did they think that IRS agents would come to their door to demand Obamacare tax penalties? Why did they think that Obama and Hillary were coming for their guns?

Because Republicans are dumb.

Why did they think that Mexico would pay for a border wall to keep out Mexicans? Why do they yell at Indian Sikhs for being terrorists? Why do they side with traitors past and present, crying like snowflakes to defend Confederate monuments while demanding that football players stand for the flag? Why did they think it was funny to make a reality show star the leader of the free world just to “shake things up?” Why do they watch Fox News, which is under FBI investigation for spreading Russian propaganda?

Because Republicans are dumb.

Why do they use “whataboutism” counter-arguments for just about fucking everything in the public discourse, a known Soviet propaganda technique? Why did their political party accept money from Russian oligarchs? Why do they think that, just because Democrats are saying the same words that came out of their mouths like “this president is an embarrassment” and “he is trampling on the Constitution” that it makes this current total shit show just “politics as usual”? Why do Republicans defend a President who obstructed justice on national television and whose son admitted to conspiring with the Russians to win the 2016 election?

Because Republicans are dumb.

These idiots came out of the woodwork to bray like lobotomized donkeys when Donald Trump was elected. Thanks to them, we have Nazis killing innocent people in the streets of America. We are on the brink of nuclear war in Asia via Twitter. We are the embarrassment of the world.

Thanks, you dumb Republican motherfuckers.